


If You Believe

by anyapie



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, F/M, Modern AU, RivaMika Week, for the RivaMikaWeek on Tumblr, just give it a read if you want, rivamika, shit idk anymore
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-15
Updated: 2014-06-15
Packaged: 2018-02-04 18:17:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1788547
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anyapie/pseuds/anyapie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi and Mikasa promised each other that they would marry each other after the war between the titans and humanity. They believed, and when the time came when they were born into the modern world, living a present life, that's when Mikasa realized that life is unfair. </p>
<p>Modern AU.</p>
            </blockquote>





	If You Believe

**Author's Note:**

> June 15, Day 1 | Forget-Me-Nots  
> A. True Love  
> • Recognizing that in some universes they were meant to be…  
> • …and in others, they were not.

RMW Day 1//Forget-Me-Not

\---

 

"Mikasa."

 

Levi.

 

"If ever this battle between the titans and humanity is over, I want you to marry me."

 

Eh?

 

"What's with that expression? Don't you want to start a life with me?"

 

It's not that, it's just--

 

"Is there someone else you want to spend the rest of your life with?"

 

No! No. Never. It's only you. Just you.

 

"Good. So it's a yes then?"

 

Hmm. Yes.

 

"Well come on, say it."

 

Yes, I will marry the notorious clean-freak, sadistic and short-tempered Levi.

 

"That's more like it."

 

What if we don't see the day we get to be free?

 

"We will. If not, we'll just be reincarnated to another time, and maybe, we can get married."

 

You believe in reincarnations?

 

"Yes."

 

Okay. I believe in it too.

 

"You believed just because I do?"

 

 

"Then maybe, if both us believed, it might happen."

 

If you're not there, in my new life, I'll wait for you.

 

"I think I'll be the one who will wait, Mikasa. I'm older than you. And maybe I still am in our next life."

 

It doesn't matter.

 

"You'll wait for me, okay?"

 

 

I opened my eyes abruptly when I heard my alarm clock. The small, metallic hammer-like figure keeps on banging the two metallic bells that are attached in between it. I reached for it, flicked the switch to make it stop and stretched my limbs. Still lying on my messy, yet comfortable bed, I closed my eyes to remember the dream that I had just now.

 

 

I can remember what happened in that previous life we shared. We were happy lovers, winning every challenging combat that might have killed both of us. By supporting, trusting and believing in each other, we were almost an unstoppable pair. We were able to overcome almost anything; never leaving the other to doom. Since we wanted to live a life outside the walls, we promised each other that we would take good care of ourselves for our future's sake. Everything was going fine, if not, smoothly. But of course, life wouldn't want two people loving each other without any conflicts now, right?

 

It brings me pain whenever I think about the time that I was careless to push myself to fight. I was eliminating titans to the point that I'm surrounded; the gigantic beasts putting on their silly faces, their mouths opening as if anticipating what I would taste like. Dodging that fifteen meter titan was a careless choice; I lost my balance. And just when I was about to hit the nearest obstacle in front of me before feeling myself held in by large hands, Levi pushed me down. He died in my place.

 

Every time I go back, my hand automatically crawls to my left chest, feeling the beating of my heart. The joys that I felt with him and the pain when I lost him are all in here. Even the memories that I treasure are all placed in here - my heart. Levi is here, and he will always be.

 

That's why I keep on waiting for him. I don't know why I'm the only one who seems to have memories from my past life, but it doesn't really matter. When he sees me, he'll remember. I know he will. Because we both promised each other. I'll wait for him.

 

Opening the drawer from nightstand, I took out a silver ring. This ring here is his first and last gift to me, back to the time when we first spent time together. It was sunset when he took out a small, wooden box from his jacket, his usual bored face looking nervous, as he gave it to me. I was actually surprised that he gave me a ring; who would have thought that he was sentimental? As it turns out, this was the symbol of our unbreakable love and promise to each other. As long as we’re wearing it, we’ll always be together.

 

I don’t usually wear it on my ring finger but instead, I bought a silver necklace, attached the ring to it, and wear it around my neck. It feels safer this way.

 

I’m 20 years old, currently in my senior year in college and running for valedictorian. Eren is my brother and so is Armin. I really don’t mind since I have already treated them like my own brothers back when we were still soldiers. I also live with my parents right now, since I am really saving money. They don’t mind, and I’m surprised to know that they were supportive about the fact of moving out as soon as I graduate. Erwin told me that Hanji likes to have me in the house often, since having two boys are a little messy when it comes to the rooms and stuff. Eren and Armin on the other hand, moved out. We still see each other at school sometimes, since the three of us agreed to study in the same university but different majors.

 

Kissing the ring that I held in my hands, I hurried on to prepare for school. Only one more exam to finish and I’ll be graduating next week.

 

I don’t know why, but it looks like the people from my previous life followed me here in the present. Like take Sasha for example, she’s my classmate. Connie is her boyfriend from another class. Sasha is still the same, Potato Girl, who eats more than she should. Eren’s girlfriend is Annie, Armin’s classmates with Rico. Erwin and Hanji are my parents, which is not really surprising because of the hair color. My hair is black, yes, because I was just adopted. My father is Nile and my mother is Marie. It’s funny, thinking that I came from Nile who still has an undercut and has thin facial hair. I’m glad that it isn’t Levi, who also has dark hair. Thinking about it makes me smile, it only means that I can still meet him and we could be together. What happened with my real parents is that they got into a car accident a few years back. Sadly, it looks like destiny doesn’t want me to be with my real parents, taking them away from me even in this life.

 

“I’m off!” I called back before closing the door behind me.

 

Erwin and Hanji are good parents. I couldn’t ask for anyone better. Life seems to be alright in the present. I don’t have to protect Eren from dying, I don’t have to see lives taken away in front of my eyes and I wouldn’t have to fight for everyone with my life. Being a normal person in this era brings peace to me.

 

 

 

 

 

“Mikasa!”

 

“Oh, hi Sasha.”

 

The spacious room is a little bit noisy from all the people’s chit-chats. Sasha came up to me with an excited look on her face and bread in hand.

 

“Have you heard? Our professor can’t come today!”

 

“Oh.” Damn it. I hope there’s someone who can take his place in handing the exam to us because I just want this to end. I don’t have time for delays.

 

“And that someone else will be giving us the exams and watching over us. One with black hair and a rather, bored face,” she pouted. “Can we please have a professor who isn’t like that? I mean, professor Pixis is alright but, ungh.”

 

_One with black hair and a rather, bored face. Levi?_

 

My heart skipped a beat when I heard about what Sasha said. Could it be?

 

“Do you his name, Sasha?” I sound as excited as her, but I kept it hidden with a poker face.

 

“Sadly, no. I just overheard it from Professor Bozardo and Professor Moblit. Why? Are you also interested?”

 

“No, no. I was just curious,” I looked at the door, hiding my face with my red scarf.

 

I’m nervous now. Is this it? Can it be really him? _Levi._

 

“Mikasa, please. I can really tell you’re interested,” Sasha giggled. “C’mon now! After turning Jean down?”

 

“Jean is just a friend.” Jean’s crush on me hasn’t really faded even in this era. He’s classmates with Eren and works as a part-timer in a near bar from the university. He confessed to me when we were still freshmen, since I saw him arguing with Eren when I went to his class to deliver his phone that he left.

 

Suddenly, the doors open and everyone went quiet as they clamber their way to their seats. Immediately, my face whipped to the door’s direction.

 

As soon as I saw his face, I was holding my breath.

 

Gunther Schultz.

 

My hope shattered like a mirror, crushing my heart a little.

 

“Everyone, settle down,” he announced. “I’ll be giving you your final exam from Professor Dot Pixis. He can’t come today since he’s in the hospital.”

 

No. I was really looking forward that it was Levi. But this isn’t the time to be depressed, since I have an exam to ace. Maybe I’ll meet him soon. I can feel it.

 

 

 

 

After finishing the exam and going out with Sasha for a quick late lunch, I headed home. I haven’t really touched my food as my thoughts were scattered as soon as I went outside the university doors. I should actually celebrate and relax since everything’s over. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves as my hand touched the door handle of my home. I don’t know why but my heart is still beating fast against my chest. _Strange._ I feel like he’s near. Levi is near.

 

I turned the knob, pushed it open, opening my mouth to announce my arrival but halting immediately as soon as I saw Erwin’s back to me, and his company’s face. That’s when everything halted right before me.

 

Erwin turned to me, his face serious and his body stiff. As soon as he turned around, my eyes dropped to the shorter man before him.

 

_Levi. He’s here. He’s really here._

 

My heart is thumping faster against my chest, my palms sweaty, my knees almost shaking and my breathing shallow. I can feel tears in my eyes but I held them back. I wanted to launch myself on him, wanted to burry my face into his neck and cling to him. I wanted to drown myself into his clean, manly scent; the scent that has been haunting me for years. I wanted to lose myself as I stare into his grayish-blue eyes, wanted to taste his soft lips. He’s still the same old Levi, except that he’s wearing a black suit and he has a black messenger bag slung on his shoulders. There’s something from his eyes that I find… strange.

 

“Mikasa,” Erwin broke my thoughts. “This is Levi. Your father.”

 

_Huh?_

 

“Come inside. We need to talk.”

 

_“We need to talk.”_ What?

 

Erwin went straight to the living room, Levi looking at me from head to toe as if he was trying to squeeze something from himself.

 

_Levi. It’s me. Mikasa._

 

His eyes darted to the way where Erwin went and back to me, as if telling me to follow. He walked, and his footsteps echoed through everywhere since silence occupied the whole house. My chest feels heavy and I think I felt cool air swept through my skin. Why am I nervous?

 

I kicked off my shoes and wore my slippers; each step that I make as I walk to the living room makes me more anxious. I found them sitting oppositely in front of each other. Erwin caught my eyes and moved, gesturing that I sit beside him. Levi’s face is unreadable, and a lot of thoughts are eating me.

 

I sat beside Erwin, trying to look composed and calm, slinging my body bag off my shoulders and placing it carefully on the small table in front of us. All I did was stare at Levi, taking in his presence and his appearance.

 

_Levi. Don’t you recognize me?_

 

Erwin sighed, straightened his back as he leaned back to rest on the back pillows of the sofa. He looks stressed enough to me as I sideeyed him for a second, my eyes darting back to Levi.

 

“Mikasa, this is Levi Ackerman. He is your biological father and also your uncle,” Erwin started. “Listen to me, because this is the truth.”

 

 

“You carry the surname Ackerman, because your mother and father agreed to it. First, because they weren’t married and they agreed that you carry the surname Ackerman first before changing it to Dok; Nile’s surname. Second, because you weren’t Nile’s daughter. Levi and Marie are cousins, but they had an affair one night—“

 

Levi flinched as he heard “affair”, as if it was something bothering him.

 

“—that got Marie pregnant with you. Nobody knew of this but me, Nile, Hanji and Levi,” Erwin turned to me as he continued, “I’m so sorry to hide this from you all this time, Mikasa.”

 

 

“I didn’t know that Levi would be back to take a look at you after all,” he turned to Levi with a grim expression on his face, “We knew of the affair but never the expected that there would be a result.” Erwin rested his arms on his knees as he continued to glare at Levi.

 

“Don’t look at me like that,” Levi spat.

 

I don’t know what to feel. All I could do was listening but I never felt anything; I was numb. I was staring at Levi, who looks bored and uninterested in me. I feel cold all too suddenly.

 

“Mikasa,” Levi looked right at me, leaning slightly as he regards me.

 

I am trying hard to concentrate on his voice instead of the feeling of wailing. I missed his voice. I missed how he calls my name, the way it rolls around his tongue and it comes out of his lips. _Mikasa._

 

“I know this is sudden but I want to familiarize you, to recognize you and claim you as my daughter. Marie never told me that I got her pregnant. Will you give us time?”

 

“Why don’t you stay for dinner, Levi?” Erwin offered him, his hand holding mine and giving it a soft squeeze. I wonder how I look like in front of them right now?

 

“Sure, I’m alone when I came here anyway. Checked in a hotel near from here,” Levi crossed his legs as his arm rested on a throw pillow near him.

 

“Hanji will be here soon. I called her.”

 

 

 

 

 

“Damn it, Levi, you could have given us a call, you know!” Hanji blurted for about three times now.

 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever shitty glasses. I wanted to surprise you,” Levi replied sarcastically, rolling his eyes as he drank his juice.

 

Sitting with the three of them sharing stories about their lives in a familiar way is in the background as my mind wanders off to somewhere else where there is nothing but cool, empty space. I’m really not hungry, and I just wanted to go upstairs to my room to be alone and rest. Suddenly, I felt really, really tired. I can’t help but steal glances at Levi, the man who I have been waiting for a long time and he turns out to be my father.

 

I accidentally bit my tongue, flinching at the pain. All eyes turn on me now, and it felt uncomfortable. I reached for my glass of juice instead and taking it the remaining content down.

 

“You alright?” Levi asked me, his eyebrows furrowed in worry.

 

“Yes, excuse me,” I squeak.

 

“Mikasa honey, you haven’t really touched your food,” Hanji tells me in a soft voice.

 

“I’m really not hungry, mom,” I smiled apologetically at her, shrugging my shoulders. I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

 

Silence followed for what seems like forever and I couldn’t bare it anymore. I excused myself, standing rather hurriedly than I intend to. I made way for my bag and almost ran upstairs to my room. As soon as I close the door, I threw my bag somewhere I don’t even know as I leaned back on the hard wood, sliding down as I let my knees give up.

 

This morning, I was really motivated and I was full of hope. Yes, I did meet him now, but the heck? My head is spinning and I closed my eyes tight, trying to contain and arrange my scattered wits. I pulled my knees up, hugging them as if protecting myself from something very unpleasant.

 

My chest hurts, my body is shaking because it suddenly felt cold and I couldn’t help my tears from falling. I sobbed silently in my dark room, satisfying the suppressed urge to cry awhile ago.

 

This isn’t fair. Why, oh, why does it have to be like this? I waited for him. I’ve been a good person and I never killed anyone like I did in my past life. What the heck is going on?

 

Why? Why…

 

_Levi…_

 

 

 

 

 

Levi stayed until my graduation and he took me to overseas where he lives right now. Erwin, Hanji, Eren and Armin encouraged me to go, telling me that I deserved a break after all the studying. He was there in my graduation, looking at me as I delivered my speech and took my diploma. I noticed that he wasn’t wearing _our_ ring. He was wearing a platinum one on his ring finger which made my heart swell more.

 

And I wanted to get out of the place as soon as I arrived there, seeing his wife and daughter with warm smiles as they welcomed him home, giving a peck on his cheeks. The journey with him was rather awkward, and I wasn’t even sure if I should ask him if he remembers me. Our past life, our promise.

 

“Mikasa, this is Petra, my wife. And this is Christa, our daughter,” Levi introduced me to them, his voice laced with full adoration as he told me their names.

 

“Mikasa, enjoy your stay here. Make yourself comfortable,” Petra, the one who has hazel hair and eyes told me, giving me a quick hug.

 

Christa and Petra were all sweet and kind to me; they were very warm people and they never treated me wrong. As it turns out, Christa’s adopted since Petra can’t have kids of their own. I set my things in my temporary room, biting my lower lip now and then to calm my senses. _It’s going to be alright._

 

The real thing that I should worry about is how do I ask him if he remember the past life that we had? Will he even believe me? It looks like I’m the only one who remembers the previous life I had in this world. Not Eren, Armin and the others. Although we know each other in the present, they don’t talk about the previous lives they lived. Why is it that it’s only me who seems to remember? Will I talk to him about it?

 

“Mikasa?”

 

I nearly jumped out of my bed.

 

“Sorry to scare you.”

 

Levi went inside my room as he closed the door behind him. He was dressed in a grey t-shirt and navy jeans. It reminded me of the times that we were going to fight the monarchy itself in his casual clothes… and his ankle. He sat on the edge of the bed as he turned to look at me, is grayish-blue eyes twinkling. I think I caught something in my throat, and I couldn’t speak.

 

“I’m sorry,” he stated. “I know everything is surprising and foreign to you, but I want to make this work, somehow.” He gave me a small smile, a small but sincere smile. It’s enough to make my thoughts go away.

 

“Yes. I just need time to adjust,” is all that I could manage. How do I open the topic to him?

 

“I can wait for that, but thank goodness you’re willing to try. Would you like to rest before dinner or do you want to talk about something?” _He’s opening a chance for you._

 

My fingers automatically went to fondle with the silver ring attached to my silver necklace. I can try. I can try and ask him. Pulling my legs up to cross them, I licked my dry lips as I struggled internally for the right words to say. He shifts to his seat, as if to listen to me.

 

“Do you believe,” I glanced at the ring, “in reincarnations?”

 

He regards me impassively, as if I asked him something really tough to think about. Every seconds that tick by, I was losing hope that he might actually remember. After a beat, he spoke, “Yes. I do.”

 

Oh. Maybe he could remember. If only I could choose the right words…

 

“Do you think, we met somewhere before? In the past?”

 

“Maybe. Yes, I do,” he tilted his head to side, giving me another small smile. “To be honest, I feel you’re familiar. Like we knew each other already but you’re still a stranger to me.”

 

Somewhere from deep within me, another wave of hope splashes through me. Maybe we can make this work after all?

 

“You know, I’ve been having his dream for awhile since I was little. We were sitting under a tree, in front of a clear pond and we were surrounded by ridiculously, large walls,” he closed his eyes, as if trying to remember the dream. “There was this girl beside me and I knew she was special because I gave her something. I don’t even remember anymore. I didn’t see her face nor heard her voice, and everything was blurry.”

 

He remembers the time when he gave me this ring. But why is it not clear to him? Why can’t he have a clearer picture?

 

“I know that she’s the person special to me. I thought I could meet her one day but that was just a dream.”

 

I think I felt my heart’s crack.

 

“What if she’s here now, all ready for you?” I try to ask in a steady voice, testing the waters.

 

“Too late then. I waited for her and she didn’t came on the right time,” he licked his lips and ran his hand over his hair. “I have Petra now, and Christa. I should already be contented.”

 

Not only my heart broke another piece, but it shattered into a millions of pieces. I just don’t see the broken parts everywhere, but most of them turned into tiny bits of dust. I feel cold, and I just wanted to run away from this place. This is simply too much to bear. He obviously rejected me.

 

 

“I have to thank her now, though. Because I felt that I was so happy that she’s been a part of me, someone who made me whole. Yes, I do feel that way every time I still dream of that scene,” he looked straight at me then, sincerity in his eyes and a warm smile on his lips.

 

Maybe… maybe it wasn’t so bad after all? Maybe… maybe—

 

“Dinner’s ready!” Petra called out.

 

“We’re coming.” He called back, reaching for my hand and tugging it, telling me to get up so we can eat.

 

I don’t know if he feels it too, that electrifying sensation that warms my whole body, crawling everywhere. Just by holding hands, my body bowed to this familiar person who is a stranger to me. If I can close my eyes and pretend that he’s holding mine in his sleep instead of Petra, I would do anything again.

 

He doesn’t remember. And he’s right, he has Petra now. Everything is wrong—everything is not right. If I try and make him remember, it wouldn’t be okay with the society’s eyes and plus, I’m his daughter for goodness sake. I am not stupid enough to put everything on line just for some stupid thing. I can do this. I have to overcome this.

 

Dinner with the Ackermans are alright. They were eating silently, if not for the small talks from Christa and Petra. They were asking about me too, and I don’t really talk much. If I had this life with Levi, I couldn’t ask for more. But no, I am assigned to be his daughter in this era. Why is life so unfair? I became a soldier; a tool to save mankind from extinction. I almost gave up everything to protect Eren and everyone, betting my life for their safety. I had done a good job at it. All I wanted was to be with Levi and that promise we shared. Why does the world have to be this cruel? I waited for nothing. _Nothing._

 

_“I have to thank her now, though. Because I felt that I was so happy that she’s been a part of me, someone who made me whole. Yes, I do feel that way every time I still dream of that scene.”_

 

I guess it’s time to let go. I guess I’ll just be wearing this ring as a necklace and I won’t be able to experience him putting on this ring over my finger.

 

Levi…

 

 

 

 

 

**_25 years later_ **

 

 

“Mikasa?”

 

“Christa?”

 

“Hey. Uhm, it’s about dad…”

 

After that first vacation I had with Levi’s family, I went back to my country and started my own life. I went out with my friends more often, got a very good job and married Jean. Considering his feelings for me wasn’t bad at all; he was a very good husband and a loving father. I tried hard not to feel so bad whenever Levi would call to ask about my life. I told myself that I should come back to see him; since he still loved me in some way and that it’s one of the ways to see him. Yes, I still love him. And I haven’t seen him for years. I got a phone call from Christa as soon as I was finished doing the dishes, and from her voice, she sounded so stressed.

 

After that phone call, I packed my things and booked a flight immediately. Jean didn’t seem to mind since I told him about what Christa said. And he was supportive enough, driving me to the airport and giving me more money than I needed.

 

In the airplane, was shaky. Not because it was cold, but because I was nervous. I still wear that ring he gave me, running my fingers along the hard, round thing. I prayed silently as I pushed back the negative thoughts to the back of my brain. I’m going to see him again, after so many years. I wonder what he looks like now?

 

It took some time before I got into the airport and met Christa in their old home, the house where I left all of my hopes about us. SO much has changed, but it still felt homey like it used to. Petra died three years ago, and I wasn’t able to go to her funeral. But Christa and I settled it so it’s all fine. I gave her a quick hug as she sobbed silently on my shoulder.

 

“How is he?” I asked her, my voice raspy.

 

“Go on and check for yourself.” She gave me a small, but rather, sad smile as she pointed his room.

 

Levi has Alzheimer’s disease. He was hospitalized for years, and after awhile, got permission to continue taking his medicine at home. Yesterday, however, Christa said that he dismissed the nurse as if he remembers that he’s sick. I feel guilty about not visiting him. It’s as if I’ve left him all alone to bear this disease. My heart twisted. I shook my head. I’ll see him now and I’ll stay with him starting right now.

 

I opened the door to his room, peeking from the small space. I saw him sitting on his bed, his back resting on the pillows that were stuffed together to support him. His abdomen was covered with a white blanket and the room smelled like nasty medicine. He looks young, despite the white hair and the aged face. He looks younger than his age. Damn it, you midget. You’re old enough and yet you still look good. His head turned to me, and that’s when I noticed that his grayish-blue eyes look like they’re fading. Maybe because of aging?

 

I stepped in, closing the door behind me as I smiled warmly at him. He smiled back, but it didn’t reach his eyes.

 

“Hi. Don’t be afraid.” I sat on his bed slowly, maintaining my smile.

 

Up this close, he looks like he suffered enough with his disease. I wanted to kick myself for not visiting him. I should have at least tried to face him. I should have—

 

“I’ve been waiting for you, Mikasa,” he said. And I swear, from the way that he said those words, it’s as if I am talking to the old, Lance Corporal Levi. It gave me goosebumps. “You haven’t been visiting me.” He shook his head as his smile falls, making me feel even guiltier.

 

“Hey, I’m sorry,” I cajoled. But wait— if he forgets all the time, why is it that he can remember my name?

 

“It’s not easy fighting this fucking disease waiting for you to come and listen to what I have to say,” his voice is raspy but obviously he’s mad.

 

“What you have to say?”

 

“I remember everything now.”

 

_Holy shit._

 

I stared at him, feeling my mouth open as I blinked many times.

 

“And I don’t fucking get why everything became blurry in my dreams,” he continued, his hand reaching to clasp mine. “Life is unfair.”

 

I can feel tears starting to form from my eyes and I had to bit my lower lip to restrain it. I shouldn’t be crying in front of him now. All these mixed emotions are too much for my heart. It’s like when I was with him in a room somewhere here in this house.

 

“Yes, life is unfair,” I said in a broken voice.

 

His other hand went to my face then, caressing my cheek as I held his soft gaze. _Damn it, Levi._

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

I can feel my hand reaching up to my face too, just to hold his. My other one tightening over his free hand. “For what?”

 

“I waited for you, yes. But I never looked for you, and I settled for someone I don’t really deserve. I hurt you, Mikasa, and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry…”

 

That does it. My unwanted tears fell from my cheeks and I can feel the heat from my eyelids. I’m trying not to sob and break completely, at least.

 

“ I can’t make it right. If only I went to look for you, rather than just sitting here and wait, then maybe, I could have given you everything. I could have married you.”

 

Our promise.

 

“I know, you’re still wearing that ring,” he chuckled low on his throat and I smiled at that. I’ve missed him so.

 

“Do you have yours?” I asked him, sounding hopeful.

 

“Yes,” he let go of my face as he reached under his pillow, a silver ring on his fingers as he retracted it. “I never lost it.”

 

“Keep it.” I told him. Damn, I want this to start all over again.

 

“Why don’t we exchange?”

 

“Exchange?”

 

“Our rings. Give me yours and I’ll give you mine. Maybe, just maybe, our promise can work,” he sounded hopeful too.

 

It looks like I’m not the only one who’s keeping her hopes high up. It’s him as well, he’s remembering everything and he’s talking to me. The old Levi… _Corporal Levi._

 

“Will you believe again, Mikasa? Believe in another life? In reincarnation?”

 

_Yes. Yes. Fuck, yes._ I nodded.

 

“I’m glad. Because I still do, despite this sucking setting.”

 

I reached to my necklace and pulled the ring out of the silver string, reaching for his left hand and inserting mine to his ring finger. For some reason, I chanted the wedding vow I had to memorize. But it wasn’t meant for Jean this time—it was for Levi. I heard him chuckle. He did the same, but he didn’t say something he used for his wedding vow. Instead, he kissed the ring that he gave to me, he kissed it when I was wearing it on my ring finger—I removed Jean’s ring and put it on my purse—his warm, shaky breath touching my skin, making my veins sing. There’s still that exciting feeling.

 

This may seem incest to other people, and it is. It’s forbidden, it’s gross and it’s all too wrong. But shutting off the society, shutting off all the people and the environment that surrounds us, just between the two of us, I can see my Corporal who I swore that I would serve for Eren’s safety. I can see his young and short stature, his stoic appearance and his cool manners. We just belong to our world right now.

 

I joined him on his bed, his arm wrapping around my shoulder as I lean close to him, smelling the nasty smell of medicine and his own, natural scent. Right now, I don’t care. Right now, I am happy and content being in the arms of this man that I love. This man who I was forbidden to love in this life.

 

“I won’t hold one much longer, Mikasa.”

 

“I know.”

 

“I have to go. As much as I hate to, I have to.”

 

“It’s alright,” I sniffed. “It’s alright, as long as in the next life, we can make this work. It’ll be us loving each other. You’ll be marrying me and I’ll be marrying you.”

 

I reached for his free hand, filling the spaces between his fingers with mine. He’s almost cold, but it’s fine.

 

“It’s almost sunrise,” he whispered, his voice weak and bleak.

 

“Yes, it is. It’s like the last sunrise we ever saw together before you saved me.”

 

“Can we close our eyes and sleep? Because that’s what we did back then.”

 

“Yes.”

 

Giving each other a knowing look and a warm smile, we closed our eyes as the skies were turning blue. It won’t take long, morning will come and another day will begin once again. We both drifted into a peaceful and contented sleep, our hands still joined with each other. Before I was taken into dreamland, I can feel his shallow breathing until it came to a stop. I couldn’t help but just let the drowsiness take over, pulling me into realm of darkness with Levi.

 

 

 

 

 

“Mikasa.”

 

 

“Why are you crying?”

 

Oh. I didn’t know I was crying.

 

“What did you dream about? Please tell me.”

 

I—

 

“Oh, tell me later then. The bells are ringing. Come, we have to get up.”

 

Levi. Wait.

 

“Why are you touching my ring?”

 

There. I kissed it for you.

 

“Hmm.”

 

Hmm. I love you.

 

“I love you most.”

 

 

 

 

 

Levi. No matter how hard the situation is, no matter how fucked up everything seems to be, I’ll always, always love you. And I’ll believe in whatever you believe in. I’ll place my faith in you, give my all to you, because you’re someone I’ll do anything to protect. May it be in different worlds, in different eras, living in a different life… no matter how long it’ll take, I’ll wait for you. And I’ll come and look for you, because you’re that person I want to spend the rest of my life with.

 

Our promise will be forever. We can make this work. I know it will.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time ever that I wrote a modern AU fic. My first contribution ever for the RivaMika Week! And I just wanted to say thank you to those who inspired me to write. I want to say thank you s freaking much to my bby, Susu, for proofreading this for me! I appreciate it so much, thank you, thank you. Reviews are always welcome and let me know what you think. More fics will be coming for this week since I have ideas for the prompts. This fic's title is inspired by Adam Lambert's song, "If You Believe", and I posted the lyrics that I thought were fit enough for this story.Thank you for reading this. c:
> 
> You can hit me up at [tumblr](jigz-anyapie.tumblr.com) if you wanna stalk me. Pfft. Jk.


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